Finding Momentum

There is a strange art instal­la­tion in the side of the Vuit­ton store here in the mall that my fam­ily walks through each night–a neon-rimmed iri­des­cent par­a­bolic reflec­tor behind wall-to-wall glass, a bright bulb in the mid­dle direct­ing light into the cen­ter of the mall. Return­ing the gaze of the giant iris evokes a haunting […]

Look up, look up, look up, look up. Life is far too beau­ti­ful, far too valu­able to waste it on your­self. It is a gift; you are to love, live, give breathe. We were made with too many holes, I think. They accu­mu­late, these scrapes and bruises as we teeter off bicy­cles, miss appoint­ments, exhale […]

We sit in the van breath­ing the same air, together in the seven-seater as a fam­ily for the first time in many years. “It’s so weird,” my sis­ter insists, “it’s so weird, grad­u­at­ing.” Four hun­dred fam­i­lies had cel­e­brated her grad­u­at­ing class that after­noon.
My dad looks over the driver’s seat, “How does it feel?”
“It’s a weird feeling,” […]

Do you ever worry about los­ing your­self in some­body else? That they would com­pletely and fully engulf you in your every wak­ing moment. That their words would become your words, their thoughts would become your own, their iden­tity is trans­planted into your own? Are you ever as miss­ing as the empty pil­low beside you; lonely […]

[HE, a young man stands in cor­ner of room, back turned away from HIM, a fatherly fig­ure. A chair in the mid­dle of the room.]
HE: [paces room] It’s like I’m stand­ing here at the precipice, some sort of mile high moun­tain [stands up on chair] and I’m look­ing down at the val­ley below and I scream […]

Some­times you wish you had a cam­era with you, but I’m glad I don’t this time. It’s quite pic­turesque, this view with the Bay Bridge lit by the glit­ter­ing gold of sky and watery reflected light, framed by the omi­nous pres­ence of fast-floating rain­clouds (with troves and spots and col­ors of blues, pur­ples and electric […]

I was at Haste House prayer this morn­ing and in the mid­dle some folks started cry­ing for the bro­ken and lost and oppressed of the world. Half-sobs, salt-blister tears and only what can be described as cries to a One who promised to be pow­er­ful and mighty and just. I wrote them down (I hope […]

Last night I dreamt again I was play­ing the piano. It was a melan­choly piece, set to rain­drops echo­ing off roof shin­gles. I was play­ing by sight, with no direc­tion or clo­sure in mind. It was sim­ple, just: play what comes to mind and to ear.
I played in D# minor, no par­tic­u­lar rea­son except that I’ve […]

It comes like a beau­ti­ful blow to the head, a thun­der­ous, laugh­ter­ous cathar­sis. It’s a hammer-blow to your rose-colored world; you fall with it and you laugh as you pick up pieces. The laugh­ter con­trols you, it is from you but not of you.
So it is, you learn to love the shards; they’re more beau­ti­ful that […]

I. Striv­ing is Futile
I’m thank­ful; this week I real­ized
I’m not who I think I am and I
can’t do what I thought I could so I
am less of a Super
Hero! than I thought.
II. Give And Take: A Fair Trade.
Bro­ken down and brought back up.
Rinse and repeat. I can’t
quite fig­ure this out but it can’t be nor­mal.
III. […]